But I started to get sucked into the images and confessions and vaguely, the slow drip of remembering who I was and where I was in my life when I saved each individual one began to seep through my cracks.
And I had to stop.
Because once I start going down that road, it's really hard to come back.
We've spent all day working on the house -- I'll have some photos to share this week over at the house blog for the first time in a while -- and the change has been good for the unrest I've felt in my soul. Not to give too much away, but I just may have a new place to write soon, which is very exciting and long overdue.
As for the snippets I've been posting -- the responses I've been getting are truly overwhelming. There is a small circle of people who have read what I'm sharing prior to this, who inflated my ego enough for me to feel confident to leak it a little, but I am flabbergasted by the positive feedback. I have a little more to share from that, but soon I'll have to lock myself away and crank more out, being careful not to end up publishing the whole thing online before I actually publish it, you know?
I still didn't run today. But I'm less upset about it today since I feel like I got some real things accomplished, which in turn pave the way for more change, more check marks on the to-do list, more freedom to actually pursue my goals instead of feeling trapped in a corner trying to claw my way out.
Figuratively and, as any parent of small children will know, literally.
UPDATE: And then the PostSecret Twitter posted this and that's pretty much exactly what I was looking for.