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Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Totally Awkward Tuesday.

A short one for you today.

So last week when I was feeling a bit under the weather but hadn't hit full zombie status just yet, I went ahead and went to dance class. I felt a bit out of it, but not terrible.

Class was fun, learned a new routine, got a little sweaty, was happy to be heading home when it was over, no big.

But on the way home I realize that I'm not cooling down as quickly as I usually am. So I decide to treat myself to a dollar ice cream cone at McDonald's because I'm a grown up and can have ice cream whenever I damn well please.

I stop by the Golden Arches by my house and go through the drive through, again, no big, just regular life activities, right?

So when I get to the first window to pay I had over my debit card because we never have cash any more, and I notice the girl working the window does a double take at my card.


She smiles really big at me as she hands it back and then closes the little windows. A little odd, but I try not to think about it because my head's starting to hurt and I just want to go home.

As I'm putting my debit card away, suddenly the window pops open again and the girl is leaning near halfway out of it as she stumbles over her words as teenagers are apt to do when they're nervous or excited or you know, being teenagers.

"So, umm, do you like, you know, um, know, what's his name again, shoo, a, uh, Kyle, M---------?" she asked kind of giggling.

I turned just my head back to the window and kind of half-smiled as I nodded at her. Shit.

"Yeah, that's my husband ..."

"I KNEW IT! HE'S MY TEACHER! I though I recognized you from his photos with your hair and all that! Mr. Muntzinger is my teacher!"

"... yeah, heh, I'm Mrs. Muntzinger."

Not only did calling myself Mrs make me feel old and sad, but realizing that I'm in my gym clothes, post-dance class, sans-makeup, hair disheveled and in desperate need of maintenance and what am I doing other than getting myself some ice cream like a damn CHILD.

Of course the car in front of me ordered everything on the menu so I'm stuck waiting with the chipper little teenager who is just THRILLED to have met me in the wild while I just want to hang my head in shame and go to bed.

Soon enough the car in front of me moves forward and so the girl tells me to tell Kyle hi for her and I pull up for my ice cream cone and drive towards home, feeling just defeated by life for no other reason than I'm in my late twenties and married to a high school teacher.

Then of course I woke up the next day dying of the plague, so all things in perspective I guess that's what I get for pushing myself when I should have listened to my body and no amount of ice cream will ever make up for a little late-night public humiliation.